I am fearful that I have been OVER MANIPULATING my hair.
What does over manipulate mean, you may ask...
Well, I have a dirty little secret. I have been using my CHI flat iron on my hair. I am not straightening my locs, per say. I am just pulling the loc through the flat iron so that my lenghth will show. I don't use the flat iron all the way down the shaft of the loc, only through the loc'd portion. With all of my knowledge of hair, I know this isnt healthy for my hair in general or locs. I also am afraid of disturbing the locing and maturation process of my hair. Word to the wise - don't start using any heat on your new locs. Try braid outs, twists, cornrolls, or rollers if you dont want your hair to shrink. These options are more time consuming, but I am certain it will be worth it in the long run.
I guess part of me is still growing out of the stage of "self - hatred" i.e the need to appear euorcentric with straight, long, silky hair. My family has always assoicated long hair with beauty, and short kinky hair with "ugliness". Over the holiday break my two older sisters made several negative references to my new locs. Honestly, it hurts. Identify and image complexes in the Black community are issues that truly run deep. I could write a disertation on those things... but I wont.
I will say I am going to commit to no longer using heat on my hair. Tonight I spritzed my hair with water, parted, and braided. Hopefully braid outs with strech my hair, so I don't have that "shrunken" appearance, which I just can't cope with.
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